A study by Japan’s Kitasato University recently looked at the slipperiness of banana peel skins and why people slip on them. The supposedly intelligent academics measured the friction of banana peels compared to other fruits to try and understand why we always slip on them.
Can you believe this actually got funding, took up academic time or even passed the various stages in the university?
Well, it won the latest annual Ig Nobel Prize, which awards the most pointless and ridiculous research carried out that year.
In the business spectrum this is also the case and the amount of pointless ‘research’ currently being carried out by consultants, think tanks, survey companies and supposed experts is, frankly, staggering. Every time a PR or marketing person emails me or calls me with the results of one of these studies my usual reaction is ‘so?’
What’s the point in carrying out research if it’s pointless obvious? Use your time, expertise and funds to do something that is meaningful and contributes something to the general argument.
I suspect that it mainly just a cheap way to gain quick publicity for the company or brand attached to the ‘research’ or findings. This practice is something I think is a massive cyst on the PR industry in general and, again, utterly pointless.
For example, in the last few days alone I’ve been emailed the following research findings. I can’t for the life me think why they bothered writing the email, let alone thought the findings were of any importance to anyone. I’ll not mention who they came from so we can spare their blushes and to avoid giving them the air time they obviously crave.
A think thank apparently interviewed a few hundred journalists around the world on social media. They found that 90 percent of journalists think that increased ‘citizen journalism’ via social media has not reduced the importance of official media outlets. Well I’m certainly shocked.
Wait for it… it also found that just under 90 percent of them also believe social media has changed the role of journalists when it comes to breaking news stories. ‘Utter dross,’ was how one colleague described the research. I don’t think he tweeted that though, he’s obviously one of the 10 percent from above.
Then we have Dubai real estate, which brought up two great clangers this week. One high profile, and usually respectable, consultancy firm sent out one massively detailed report that concluded that hotels located in or near theme parks generally have a higher occupancy rate than those located further away. Hmmmmm…
Not to be outdone, another well-known real estate firm released a report with the shocking finding that properties located close to the Dubai Tram will likely see an increase in property prices when the transport system starts next month. Really?
Consultants are about as popular in my book as lawyers, real estate agents and dentists but I blame them for the avalanche of dross that results in this kind of so-called research. With so many important issues in the world, let’s stick to funding things that matter and whose conclusions aren’t glaringly obvious. If a survey company suggests a survey and you suspect you already know the answer then is it really worth doing it?
Lastly, for your extra amusement, here’s some more results from scientific studies that actually made it into print:
– Drivers who use their phones while driving react slower
– Women who wear high heels said they feet hurt more than those who wore flats
– Men get upset when they go bald
– Employees hate meetings
– Having friends makes you healthier
– People wear more clothes when it’s cold
– People who are drunk are more likely to have unprotected sexual intercourse
– Female bar staff who are pretty get higher tips
– Children should not be left on ledges as they are likely to fall off
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