There’s a saying that goes along the lines of “a truly creative person rids him or herself of all self-imposed limitations”.
The reason why I find this quote to be beautifully accurate is because, as human beings, we are creatures of emotions and having the gift of being creative in any outlet for that matter can be a driving force in one’s life.
I’ve always had the need to create and growing up, because I was on the shy side of things, visual narration was my voice. Fast forward to graduating and getting into the workplace, I was rather passionate and driven to prove myself in an industry that is in constant growth and technological advancement.
Within the first month of me working in an agency, I had mixed feelings of both joy and stagnancy which completely weirded me out since this was exactly what I had wished for, meaning a job where I am able to do what I love on a daily basis – little did I know that there is more to work than just “doing what you love”.
I felt that I had so much to offer yet I was my own enemy for being in constant doubt of whether I’ll be able to “make it” or not. After only one month of being employed, I quit. I did not feel adequate being in a place where I’m supposed to be so happy and yet reality was the exact opposite.
I felt that, in order to go back into a steady job, I had to take it upon myself to have a one-year challenge of advancing my mental, creative, and technical skills. This allowed me to explore what it’s like to rediscover a passion I had during my university years, the same passion that I’d lost getting in the workplace due to my own self-doubt.
Throughout that year, I was able to learn more about what burnout, lack of motivation, and procrastination are. In parallel, I had constant anxiety of whether I’d be able to sustain myself during the year considering that I was unemployed with limited savings.
Nonetheless, the results were fruitful. I had the privilege of working with big names around the globe on so many exciting projects, I started developing a voice, a style, and a message in what I do. I was [positively] all over the place, from editorial illustrations, to children’s books, to music packaging, and animation.
However, I was still in need of achieving a balance between my work life, and my own mental health. I had plenty of internalising to do, but I was too reluctant to face it. This is when I decided to seek professional therapy, and even though we still have a lot of predisposed labels and stigma when it comes to therapy, it is actually very simple: if you are a human being, at some point in your life, you would need to go to therapy.
Imagine that you’re a book, and you’ve been on a shelf for so long, you collect dust; therapy is the feather duster that comes along and cleans you up, you’re not a new person, you’re only the same human but with more insight and self-awareness.
Mental health is imperative in one’s life, and specifically, in the workplace. Through mental discipline, journaling, and going back inwards, I became aware that my self-worth should not be intertwined with my level of productivity, or my online presence. It was all about finding the balance to do what you love, while loving yourself, through taking care of your mental health, and physical health for that matter.
The blessing of all blessings was being able to incorporate the importance of mental health as a pillar into my work and what I do in this large creative industry, in hopes I’ll be able to make a positive change, even if it is a small dent.
Fast forward to present time, I am now a university instructor of graphic design, and what is beautiful about it is that I have a responsibility towards myself and my students, to assert the presence and importance of mental health in the classroom.
My freelancing career is no different, there is always the reminder of keeping my mental health in check, and making sure that I am true to myself and what I have to offer to myself and to others.
For any creative person out there, you have a gift, hone that gift and nurture it, but do not forget to nurture your own self, realise your self-worth, and make sure you don’t blur the lines between your well-being and your productivity; you may never fill from an empty cup.
Rafik El Hariri, illustrator and university instructor.
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